


My Drabbles and Thoughts

by sarahdarling



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Academy Era, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Freeform, Agents of SHIELD, Baby Fic, Drabble, F/M, Feels, Fitz as a father, FitzSimmons - Freeform, Future Fic, Gen, Secret Relationship, Unrequited, clueless!Jemma, confused!Jemma, friends first, headcannon, injured!Fitz, longer than a drabble, lovesick!Fitz, non-cannon, real science, s2e1 - Shadows, suspend your disbelief for some of these
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-12-02
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:34:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21608392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahdarling/pseuds/sarahdarling
Summary: Somewhere I can post my AoS drabbles. Will be mostly FitzSimmons (it's the ship that sails itself). Some of the works were written for a different fandom but I have re-written them to fit into this fandom. Most, or all, will be AU or cannon-divergent.The rating updated to T, but I will post a separate story for the Explicit stories (my mind lives in smut territory).
Relationships: Leo Fitz & Jemma Simmons, Leo Fitz & Jemma Simmons & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Leo Fitz/Jemma Simmons
Comments: 8
Kudos: 20





	1. Toes

**Author's Note:**

> This story was based on my four month old baby's obsession with her toes. It is dedicated to her, Moira Rose.

For a baby, there was no greater joy in the world than toes. Your toes were always there for you whenever you needed them. They never judged you and never left you. Toes were the perfect companion.

Looking down into the crib where his baby daughter played, Fitz smiled. He was already so taken with her and she had only been in his life a few short months. Gurgling, she rolled onto her back and pulled her toes up to her face.

He silently laughed as she sang to her toes. It was a nonsense song, but it was quickly becoming his favorite. She caught his eye and lifted a foot in his direction as if she was offering him a taste of her toes. Shaking his head, he grinned and leaned in close.

"Mmmmmm," he said, "toes, my favorite." She giggled and pulled the toes back into her mouth.

He rested his head on the edge of the crib while still looking down at her. His life had already changed so much with the addition of this bundle of joy and he couldn't be happier. Right now, everything he needed in life was right in front of him. Little Maggie FitzSimmons would always be his pride and joy and he would do anything for her. Anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for giving me a chance! Kudos and reviews will be held in a special place of the writer's heart.
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr as @sarah--darling


	2. Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When the relationship progresses to more, it becomes their secret, and they're not ready to tell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story was originally written for the Castle universe (any fans out there?). The twist was it wasn't about Castle and Beckett, but about Esposito and Lanie. I was considering changing it to a Huntingbird story, or Philinda, but I couldn't help myself. Set around the third season, but can probably be imagined in different seasons too.

Everyone had their own secrets. This is something they were well aware of. So why couldn't they have their own little secret? It's not like everyone needed to know that they took their relationship to the next level. That was something private, something between them, and them alone.

It started months ago after a long and difficult mission. After years of working together, their walls finally crumbled and he found himself pulling her close and leaning down for a kiss. She let herself relax in his arms and her lips met his. Their kiss took on a life of its own and from that moment on their secret was formed.

Late nights were spent in the comfort of each other's arms as clothes were strewn all over the floor. Time was always made for early morning lovemaking. Sly smiles would be exchanged in the lab on those mornings. No one knew their secret and they were intent on keeping it that way.

Confessions of love came early in the relationship. They had already wasted so much time; they vowed not to let that happen again.  
Within two months, he cleared a drawer out for some of her clothes. It was a big step. He had never regularly shared his space with a woman. She smiled as she kicked her shoes off and promised not to eat all the hidden snacks. He laughed silently and kissed her hard.

Three months in they considered telling their close friends.

"Everyone will be supportive." He said.

"Everyone will know." She said. He let the subject drop after that.

After the fourth month, she barely spent any time in her room. His dresser was already full of her clothes and her shoes were thrown in a pile by the door. He laughed one night when she tripped over her black boots. She smiled and threw a pillow at him. Later that night, when the lovemaking was through, he took a deep breath and asked her to move in, officially. She sighed and looked at him thoughtfully.

"Not yet, but soon." She said. He nodded in understanding.

Five months had passed, and she took his offer of moving in together. Their secret was still intact, and it was getting harder and harder to keep this private. They worked with very clever people after all. Standing in her room one night, surrounded by her belongings, they both agreed that they would keep up the charade until they were ready to be public.

"It's a waste of time." He said. "But I'll give you whatever you want." She smiled at his words because she knew they were true.

Their sixth month arrived, and they were more in love than ever. Cohabitation came easy to them, probably because they already spent so much time together. She fit in well in his room and he fit in well in her heart. With their secret still private they felt like they could take on the world.

One late night at work they were both exhausted. This would be one of the rare nights that they didn't make love but just fell into bed. They were alone in the lab, which was a first for them. He could tell she was frustrated, and he reached out and ran his fingers down her face. She leaned into his touch and for a moment forgot where she was. Their lips met of their own accord and minutes passed with soft caresses.

"Whoa!" Came a woman's voice. They broke apart and tried to look innocent. She smiled as she approached them. "Looks like you two are having a fun time while the rest of us work." She felt herself blush.

"We were just taking a break." She squeaked out.

"I can see that." She said. "Listen," she whispered, leaning closer, "whatever is going on with you two is just that: going on with the two of you. It's not my place to tell secrets." They both let out a sigh of relief. "However, I will say this: You both better tell Coulson, and probably May, before they figure out something is up and come after me for not telling them." She smiled. "This is for you." She handed Simmons a vile. "Have fun." She said wiggling his eyebrows.

Once Daisy had left the lab, they looked at each other for a long time. Simmons spoke first.

"Can we tell them after this mission is finished?"

Fitz smiled at her. "Sounds like a plan."

Their secret had lasted a lot longer than they thought it would and even though they both trusted Daisy, she was right. It was time to tell the people that were important to them. Besides, their secret was only ever meant for two people, three people would just ruin it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Recycle, Read, Review.
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr as @sarah--darling


	3. Side By Side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set in their Academy days, this tells the story of what happens after a night in the Boiler Room and, how they first interacted with each other. Unrequited love on Fitz's part (of course) and Simmons is clueless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was only going to be a quick drabble, but after being inspired by my niece, Maddie, and her writing I expanded it to a longer chapter. This is definitely a story and not a drabble, but the "Thoughts" section of the title should cover me. Also, the science is real. I researched that information and made it as accurate as I could. Please, someone, tell me if the science is wonky and I'll correct it. Please keep in mind, this has not been betaed. This is all me. Enjoy!

Fitz awoke slowly in the small bed. He was still on his right side, his head propped up on his arm. The pillow was nestled underneath the woman sleeping side by side next to him, Simmons. Neither one was under the duvet that covered the mattress and sheet. It wasn’t the first time they shared a bed, but this time, it was due to heavy intoxication on her part from a fairly rowdy Saturday night in the Boiler Room. Really, the only reason he stayed at all was to make sure she didn’t choke on her own vomit. He had even placed a bin next to her side of the bed so she could use that instead of having to run to her bathroom. 

Flipping over to his left side, he checked on her. Simmons had her back to him, as was the customary way when they shared a bed, but was snoring slightly, which was new. He silently laughed. She was really too adorable… beautiful, intelligent, kind, and a million more things he constantly had running through his brain since he first started with SHIELD. 

_When he first arrived at the Academy of Science and Technology he heard of the other UK “child genius” that would also be attending. The first time he saw her was from across the room. His breath had caught, and his chest constricted. He was doomed from the beginning. What followed were the most difficult three months he had faced so far. It’s not that the classes were incomprehensible, those were easy. He was struggling with the perfect opening line. Sure, they had already debated a few times within their classes, loudly, with the entire class waiting for them to finish, but that was science. Science was factual. It didn’t need to be charming or funny, it was just the facts. He had already tried to impress her with his knowledge during debates and his excellent test scores, but it wasn’t working. If anything, she was competing with him and, to top it all off, he had still not been able to catch her personal attention. He was persona non grata to her._

_The next semester started and, low-and-behold, the chem lab proved to be his savior. He was assigned to work with Simmons during this lab. They both moved to table three, which would be their joint work station._

_“Jemma Simmons,” she said cheerfully holding out her hand. “Biochem. I’m sure you already know that, but, technically, this is our first face-to-face.”_

_He took her hand in his and shook it. “Leopold Fitz, engineering. Call me Fitz. It’s nice to officially meet you.” That was smooth, wasn’t it?_

_“Alright students, please begin your experiments,” said their professor._

_“Shall we get started then?” she asked in her, what he would come to call, professional voice._

_“Right,” he said. Nervous energy passed through him. Being this close to her was new and he was floundering. “So, we’re attempting to identify compound A and the natural product N.”_

_She rolled her eyes, which he found endearing, and commented, “Yes Fitz, I read the summary too. Now grab some gloves. We need to assume that these materials are hazardous.”_

_He reached over and plucked two sets off gloves from the box, handing her a pair. Without speaking, they both took the protective eyewear and put them in place. Simmons took the material, a vial filed with a gray, odorless powder, in her hand and they got down to work. After performing distillation Fitz recorded the melting point and the refractive index. Next, he recorded the infrared radiation, nuclear magnetic resonance, and UV spectra. He already formed an idea of what the compound was but wanted to have confirmation via microanalysis. Simmons then took a purified sample of the compound. Placing the slide under the microscope, she leaned in close to view the compound._

_Fitz moved closer and got a whiff of her scent. It was flowery and sweet, with an underlining chemical smell, which could be coming from the lab itself, but he felt as though she would always smell this way. Observing her at this distance, he could see little freckles spread across her check, which meant they must be all over her face. Maybe even on other parts of her that Fitz would refuse to acknowledge he thought about, but in reality, he had spent many nights wondering. Those nights usually ended up in a cold shower._

_“Interesting,” she said. “What do you think?” She moved aside so Fitz could also view the slide._

_“Well,” he said sighing, “this is almost too easy.”_

_“Yeah,” she responded. They shared a look, she was smiling brightly but Fitz broke away, embarrassed that she might see more than his work ethic in his eyes._

_“Silicon dioxide,” they both said at the same time. Fitz’s nerves settled a bit then, realizing she was on the exact same page as he was. He knew she could keep up with him intellectually due to their debates in other classes but was impressed to find she seemed to share the same thoughts._

_“So, we know that it is SiO 2,” Simmons announced, “which probably means that the origin is most likely safe.” _

_He nodded. “Let’s purify the sample and record the optical rotation, but in my opinion, we‘re looking at monomeric silica acid…”_

_“… from a supplement for beauty, bone health, and joint support. Yes!” She had completed his sentence so flawlessly that his mouth dropped open. He closed it quickly before she turned towards him and said: “Excellent job Dr. Fitz.”_

_“You as well, Dr. Simmons.” They shared another smile that lasted longer than either had been expecting it to._

_While she finished the experiment, he dug out his ancient laptop and began to write their report. She read out the completed findings and he rapidly finished the report. He submitted the report to the professor’s dropbox and closed the laptop. They cleaned up together, working well as a team._

_“Fitz. Simmons. Fantastic job on identifying your compound and product.” their professor exclaimed. “In record time too. Check your drop boxes for tonight’s problems.” They both nodded in thanks and he went back to observing the other students._

_Simmons gathered her things and readied herself to leave. Fitz panicked at the thought of spending so little time with her that he blurted out to her back: “I need help with the problems!” He quickly shut his mouth as she turned around. She had to know it wasn’t true, but he hoped she wouldn’t question it._

_“Yeah, okay. When are you available?”_

_“Tonight at 9pm? In my dorm room?” Thoughts of her in his personal space had his heart racing. He hadn’t had anyone in his room since he started at the Academy. This was the boldest move he ever made, surpassing the fact that he had left home to go to MIT as a young man and even completed his PhD before his 16th birthday._

_“Sure. Let me give you my number and you can text me your info.” She smiled. He pulled out his phone, unlocked it, and handed it to her. She entered her information and handed back the phone. “See you later.” With that, she turned around and walked out of the laboratory._

_He grinned and watched her go, all the while thinking about the fact that she would be in his room tonight. Where his bed was…_

Shaking his head to clear his thoughts of the past he flopped back onto his back and covered his face with his hands. There was no way she felt for him as he felt for her. 

“Nnnnn.” he heard her groan. He laughed out loud and silently did not envy the headache she must have. “Too loud! Also, too bright, why are the curtains open?” 

“Oh…” He got up from the bed to fetch her some ibuprofen, “that’s because last night you insisted we look at the stars before going to sleep. Every time I tried to close them, you would climb up on the desk and pull them open again.” She could hear the smile in his voice. He grabbed a paper cup from her bathroom and filled it with water. Walking back towards the bed he held out the items he got for her, “Here. Take these and drink this.” 

She swallowed the pills easily and finished off the water. 

“Tea?” she requested. 

Fitz shook his head. “You need more water first. Why don’t you change clothes while I go and get you a bottle of water from the common room?” 

“Ugh!” She pulled her pillow over her head. “Fine.” Her muffled voice called. 

Still smiling he left her dorm room and walked towards the common room located at the end of the hall. Checking his watch, he saw that it was just past 8am, which is, usually, a late start for Simmons. Several of the doors of the other dorm rooms were opened and he could see other students sitting at their desks, working, even though it should be a lazy Sunday morning. 

He arrived at the common room and walked directly to the fridge. He pulled out two bottles of water and closed the door. Walking over to the couch he saw that Sally Weber was watching the local news. He stood there, watching it as well, to give Simmons some time to change. Looking over her shoulder, Sally noticed Fitz. 

“Hey,” she said. “What are you doing here so early?” 

“You didn’t hear about Simmons antics with Allie in the Boiler Room last night? Allie challenged Simmons to a drinking contest. They started with beer and somehow moved on to tequila when I wasn’t looking. I finally pulled her out of there at 1am. Milton took Allie to her dorm and I bought Simmons to her’s. I stayed to make sure she didn’t get sick all over the place. She’s just getting up now.” 

Sally laughed. “That’s why you stayed, hmm?” She waggled her eyebrows. Fitz rolled his eyes, something he rarely did and turned away. 

“Have a good day Sally.” 

“Yeah, you too! Say hi to Jemma for me!” 

She used Jemma so causally that he became jealous. He didn’t call her Jemma, well, not in front of her. Maybe, on those nights he was alone and let his thoughts, and hands for that matter, wander, he would utter the name, but never in front of other people. He was her best friend. Why wasn’t he calling her Jemma? Yes, it was more professional to refer to her as Simmons, but their relationship had moved into a personal capacity. He couldn’t remember the last day he spent without her by his side. Whether it be during classes or watching Doctor Who, they did it all together. 

He arrived at her door and knocked, just to make sure he didn’t catch her in a state of undress. She called out “come in” and he followed the instructions. She was sitting on her bed now, fresh clothes and hair in a ponytail. He wordlessly handed her one of the water bottles. She took it gratefully and took a large swig. He leaned against her desk and she turned to face him. 

“Why don’t I call you Jemma?” he said without thought, but now that it was out, he wanted to know. 

“I don’t know. You’ve called me Simmons since we first met.” She smiled at him, “I wouldn’t mind if you started though.” 

“Okay, Jemma. Finish that water and I’ll take you down to the café for some tea.” The blush on his face was hidden behind the smile that was blooming. She gulped the rest of the bottle down and threw it in her recycle bin (because of course, she had a recycle bin in her dorm room). She stood up and motioned to her door with her head. 

Exiting out the dorm, Fitz felt lighter. He now had permission to call her Jemma. Considering that she said that she wouldn’t mind him calling her by her first name, he hoped that meant her feelings for him were also more than platonic. He knew he would have to make an actual move if he wanted their relationship status to change again, but he was too scared that he would ruin the only real friend he had ever known. 

Walking side by side down the hallway, right at this moment, he was happy. He didn’t know what the future would hold for them, but he knew that he had moments like this, when they were together, to get him through anything. That was good enough for now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Reviews are considered a delicacy in my hometown. Please feed the Sarah.
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr as @sarah--darling


	4. Decisions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No decision is easy, especially with what she was up against, but Jemma Simmons will find her way.
> 
> Set prior to S2E1 - Shadows, before Jemma left, but long enough after the ocean incident.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the third story or drabble I have put out in the last 48 hrs. The words are flowing freely and I'm trying to capitalize on it, while I can. I appreciate anyone who reads and gives this a chance. Thanks for stopping by.

In life, decisions had to be made. Some were easy, while others are extremely difficult. Some offered a peaceful solution and others caused nothing but heartache. Some decisions turned out to be fantastic ideas, but on the whole, terrible decisions were sometimes made. No one really likes making decisions, but it's something that we all have to do. Jemma Simmons knew this, and she knew she had a very important decision to make. In all her years with SHIELD she had never faced this type of problem before. 

With another frustrating day in the lab over, she made her way to her room for a date with her bathtub and some much deserved relaxing. She smiled to herself as the door closed behind her. Home at last. Well, at least it was what currently amounted as a home. 

Making her the few steps to her bathroom, she turned both the hot and cold knobs to get her desired temperature of bath water. Plugging the tub, she reached out for her favorite strawberry scented bubble bath and poured a dollop into the running water. Satisfied with the reaction, she turned towards her bedroom and started stripping her clothes off. Wrapping her robe around her, she waited for the bath to fill up. 

Slipping out of the robe she slowly lowered herself into the steaming water. Once fully emerged in the water her eyes closed of their own accord. She leaned her head back against the edge of the tub and sighed. 

Today had been an especially hard day. She had been given an ultimatum by Coulson. Fitz was not improving at the level expected and was quickly becoming a nuisance to everyone. Not only had he been ever present in the lab, but he depended on her to complete every sentence he couldn’t. He was taking his medication but was still floundering. From the lab to Coulson’s office, even to the sparring room, he was everywhere and nowhere at the same time. He seemed to be getting worse. No matter how often she assured him that it would just take time to recover he would just give a closed mouth smile. She wasn’t helping him get better, she was prolonging his recovery time. She didn’t mean to, completing his sentences had been second nature to her, but now those words weren’t ones that would have been spoken if she didn’t say them. His temper had reached a high point too. He didn’t want to deal with anyone but her and, to put it mildly, she was exhausted from doing her work and making sure he was alright. 

_"We need to be honest here Jemma. Fitz isn’t improving and you seem to be what is holding him back." Coulson stated as they sat in his office, door closed tightly. "_

_I know. I know.” Her voice was tight, and she felt her chest restrict. “I think I need to leave for a little while. Give him some time to progress without my help.”_

_"I thought as much." He handed her a folder. "I have an assignment I think would work for you. It won’t be easy, but since you’ve been on this team you have grown and learnt so much. I have faith you can do this, but you need to know you can do this.”_

_Opening the folder, she skimmed the papers inside. Her eyes grew wide in shock._

_“Hydra? You want me to infiltrate Hydra? I’m not Ops. I don’t have the necessary skills to do the job proper.”_

_“Jemma, you’re what they’re looking for. They’re expanding the science divisions and have started taking SHIELD agents that are willing to pledge they are now loyal to Hydra.” He placed his hand on her shoulder. “Follow the science, everything else you can learn along the way.”_

She sighed again. She had two paths she could choose: leave for an undercover Hydra assignment or stay and halt the progress of Fitz’s health. Either way, she chose, she was screwed. 

Decisions were never fun, and in some cases, ended badly. Either way, she was going to be making a terrible decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, thank you for reading. Please leave some kudos or even a comment. Something to let me know you were here.
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr under @sarah--darling

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for giving me a chance! Kudos and reviews will be held in a special place of the writer's heart. Recycle, Read, Review.
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr as @sarah--darling


End file.
